Mr & Mrs Tan Tit Wei alas

Mr & Mrs Tan Tit Wei

December 27th 2008, the marriage of two of my close friend that I have known for almost 10 years now. From comrades of the same society in school, to friends, and this two from friends to lover and now husband and wife...something that none of us will ever imagine in our very first encounter.

Jacob with Sook Yen the Bride and Tit Wei the Groom

Words can never describe how happy I am for them, so, regardless how tiring I and the rest of the gang were on their wedding day, being buddy, usher and giving any help that we can, we or at least I m more than willing. I know it's a bit corny, but I'm just a little disappointed I gave not much help, haha~!

The couple with the 'heng-dai' convoy

I know there will be change, but I hope it is for better. It won't be like it used to, it will be a new form of the gang. Well, I'm anticipating our next gathering.....

The Gang

P/S: Well since they got a house of their own, isn't it a good idea to parasite on them for our activities? Wahahaha~

This is just so beautiful

Review: Guinea Pig 1 & 2 (1985) ***[GORE CONTENT ALERT]***

What is the sickest thing you ever watch? Some may say some slasher films, or bad porn or The Blair Witch Project not because of the gore but because of the camera work.

Well, if you have not watch some sick shit, go get Guinea Pig films series.

Guinea Pig series is a Japanese video series started in the 1980s, the first two can be consider as a mock up of snuff film, or as explain in the video, a 'remake' of actual snuff film.

In Guinea Pig 1 - The Devil's Experiment, there is no plot. It is explain in text at the beginning that the recording is an experiment on actual human, in this case a woman on how much pain she can take. Therefore in the next 40 odd minutes, we are fed with visuals of three guys slapping and kicking this women, pinched her with a some spanner, slammed her hand with a hammer, spin around on a chair, exposed to insanely loud music via headphone, pulled of one of her finger nails, splashed with hot oil, followed by maggots then some animal's internal organ and lastly poke a needle from the side of her face, into and out of her eye...

Detail of arm post oil burn and a sprinkle of maggots

Well, sick enough? The special effect is extremely good, most of the tortured skin or limbs looks realistic enough, although if trained and observant enough you will notice some fakeness in them. You will know it is fake when the guys are kicking the woman. They kick like sissy. If not for the poor performance of the victim, one can easily being fool to think all is real. For someone being tortured like this, I will expect more desperate screaming and begging.

Is this fake? or real?

So, if you have some digesting issue and need to vomit, watch this, it will help you a lot, but make sure you have a healthy heart to start with.

Guinea Pig 2 - Flower of Flesh and Blood does has a plot, and it is simple. Pervert stalk women, abduct them, drug them and dismembered them while they still alive but drugged. It is said to be based on a manga (the dismembered portion, basic plot of manga is totally ignore) which in turn inspired by a real snuff sent by a crazed fan to the manga artist, along with some photos and 19 pages long letter.

The pervert

After a more conventional stalking and abducting scene, for the rest of the video, a crazy guy with a samurai helmet, will first tell the audience what is he going to do, and makes parallel between the mutilation of the woman and the blossoming of a flower. He starts with cutting of the hands of the women, followed by the arms and legs. Next he gut and disemboweled the woman and finish off with a clean chop of the head. Video ends with he showing off his collection which consists of decorations made of previous victims body part and his reciting of a poem as voice over.

Look! No hands!

Well, which this can duped Charlie Sheen into believing its a true snuff film, there is at least a few points where you can deduce this is fake. First, the video shows the guy cut off the clothes of the women, the women is stripped until the undergarment but it made a jump cut to the women fully naked but covered by a piece of cloth.

What? It's fake?

Now why is this? If it is a sick enough video to show dismembering a living human body parts, why not it does not dare to show a full naked body? Hmm I did not or haven't watch any making of for this video, but I suspect the cloth plays a big part. It is a cover up. Most likely it employs the old trick where the women just show her head through a hole on the bed or chopping board and the rest of her real body may be sitting under the bed. The 'body' lying on the bed is a dummy. So, the cloth is needed to hide the giveaways.

There are also a few shots where you can see that the flesh does not really attached to the skin and bone, which is so uncharacteristic of real flesh and bones. Plus, when the skin or body is cut open, it bleeds too slow. Using a surgical knife like instrument, it will cut through the skin and flesh the moment it is stab and the blood should be gushing out asap. But in here it takes quite a few seconds.

But whole idea of dismembering when the victims is drug rather throw away a lot of sickness. If the victim is screaming and begging like hell, the impact of the violence will be greater. Thing's is, a conscious victim will have a lot of movement and struggling which make shooting dismembering the fake limbs realistically will be difficult and revealing.

Although the status of this second film is higher than the first, but the non-amateur like editing and the performance of the guy which resemble more to a mentally disturb medical examiner really does not convey the sense of brutality. It's good on the special effect, but many rooms to improve in manipulating the audiences' fear and feelings.

There area round 7 titles in the series, just done till #2. More to come folks.

Untitled II

Rainy lonely night,
Empty chest of void.
Depresses, intoxicated, confused.
Bleed but no blood, weep but no tears,
laugh but no joy, just laugh, weep, bleed.
Mind numb, body tired, eyes heavy, but heart still beating.
World changing, people evolving, rain stopping, but not yet life.
Hot air, cold night, warm blood, cold heart.
Stars hidden by rain,
heart masked by face,
intention lost in words,
me vanished in the crowds.
You no where to be found,
to be known, to be exist, to be believed.
I breath, I eat, I drink.
Live? or just living?
Live? or leaving?
All live, and all will also leave.

Review: The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)

Hmm...I never expected it to be action packed alien shooting drama. I brief research in IMDB will tell you it's more about a commentary of human being. So I actually thought it will be philosophical and there will be lot of debates rather than laser beam.

A lot of audience will be fooled to buy its ticket thinking this is just another alien invasion CGI extravaganza. But it is not. You can see what the director attempted to do, to tell us we are rotten and how ignorant and egomaniac we are thinking we own this planter all for ourselves, and how our destructive nature will let us to doom.

Sad things is, this idea in Klaatu the aliens mind does not meet with a lot of criticism or argument from the characters in the film. There is only one counter point for Klaatu's intention which it magically 'get-it' at the climax of the film (not a spoiler, it's a rather predictable plot). The content in the aspect is so minimal that makes this film like an elementary ABC book when compare to The Matrix Trilogy. The audience do not think in this film, somehow most will agree with Klaatu to kill us all.

One good thing about this film is, the apparently violence hating alien is kind of bad ass then under attack or terminating the life on earth. Unlike the over stereotyped peace loving characters in Star Trek or Star Wars or whatever star, the peaceful alien here have no problem killing anyone, and watching them conducting mass destruction towards US government officials is just so fucking satisfying.

As usual, the US government is portray as violence dumb ass, and we will have a lady 'believer' since the alien takes a male form; we must have a balance role for both gender, and all races since they shoved in one African American as a 'major' character in the form of the heroine's step son.

The best department in this film is the casting. Casting Keanu Reeves as an expressionless alien is just so perfect. But his costumer reminds us of Constantine and Johnny I don't know what film. Why the plain suit? Maybe the studio think a dude with roundneck T and jeans will not pass as an expressionless alien...

In short, if you expect GCI wars with alien, got get Star Treks or Star Wars. This is just like a poor man's version of Stanley Kubrick's 2001!

Closeeeerrrrr......

24th...it is getting closer...

No, it's not about Xmas, I don't give a damn for this pagan celebration disguised as the birthday of some carpenter (no offence, purely my pathetic brand of sarcasm).

It's about the so called Wedding of The Century.

"So-called" since I am yet lived for a century, so I can't really be sure this is the wedding most talked about I my group for this century.

Yes, so far it is the most talked about, mainly because both bride and groom from the same group. How to a certain extend boring, and fun and economic.

Boring in the sense, same people, maybe doing some different thing, in this case getting tied up.

Fun, because since both we know, it will be a fun occasion. We can joke around and referencing our internal in joke that other people may not have a clue whatsoever.

Economic in the sense that we can dispose two singles at one time using one Ang-Pow. If both is getting outsiders as their mate, then we have to give two separate Ang-Pow! See? Get it? Do the math!

Tonite, may be the very last night going out with this couple when they are still single...consider. Next time it Ms Lim will be Mrs Tan or Puan Tan, and Mr Tan will be...err..Mr Tan, still or Encik Tan.

Strange, female for Tuan is Puan but male for Puan may or may not be Tuan? How come ar?

Trailer: X-Men Origins: Wolverine

Well, they have Gambit!

Jackman's Logan is so iconic to me that I just having difficulties watching his film when he is clean shaven...

Game: Sock and Awe! - Throw the shoe at George Bush

Some great people in the net created this game~!

Like it and fun. Bush does have a natural talent to be a comical game character~!

Sock and Awe! - Throw the shoe at George Bush - link

T minus two weeks and counting...

It's less than two weeks now...the union of two close friends. I took a moment after writing the line and try to feel how excited I am now, but too bad my stomach is making an episode and I just have the sensation of want to shit...so I can't follow up that line by saying how excited I am.

I remembered when they told us their plan to marry this year end, I felt like "Wow...that is quite some time..." but now, it is just less than a week.

It's a marvel to see the groom to be guy to finally set up his own little family, being someone's husband, taking a new responsibility, being a leader, a head of a family. He is a funny guy, always funny. Sometimes the funny part is intended, but for most of the time, they appeared to be otherwise. He has the uncanny ability to use proverbs and sayings in some very curious manner, he can magically sings some totally different lyric of a song he know so well, even when the original lyric is pathetically clearly presented on the TV screen. He is just an amusing fellow.

I expected to see him grow, mature slowly but never have I expected he will take a great leap to marriage. Marriage is not for kid, especially if the groom and bride take active role organizing the wedding. It is insane. From some conversation with them I know unless you are rich enough to employ a wedding planner which will take up quite a bulk of the trouble, wedding is really an insane process, even if it is a rather 'simple' one like what they planned.

Frankly, IF I have a girl friend now and assume that we have dated for quite sometime, a few years for instance, will I be ready to marriage? No, I do not think so. I really like to live carefree. A girlfriend will do me good but not a wife and a family. Who the fuck invented some joke like marriage anyway? And we need to sign some forms for it too...I hate form filling!

A Brief Study of A Retarded Guy's Pick Up Lines

OK, am boring on a gloomy Sunday evening and what can be a better entertainment than making fun of some retarded in the net?

The below conversation is an exchange between a retarded guy and Siowgirl, a fellow blogger. I just copy paste it from her blog without permission lol!

Bold - Retarded guy
Grey - Siowgirl

Italic - My comment


y u so sexy one? (obviously the idea may originated from her MSN avatar but that is not important, a casual observer will notice, he asked "why" rather than making a remark which suggest he want the girl to know he notice she being sexy and want she to tell more why is is sexy, with the hope that she may make some 'suggestive' remark. from this we can safely say that he wants to do her...only.)

=.=
whr got

(but her reply is not the best he expected)

got la... (interpreting that she may be a little shy and as usual, retarded like him will think that the more he praise the girl, the happier she will be and she will like him more.)

nop (abrupt end, nice move)

can u gv me a hug? (retarded question to be asked online, poor follow up for the whole sexy thing. why not just ask "can I do you instead"? it is bolder and ballier.)
sure
(some cutesy emoticon) (ha~! he must expect her to ask how to hug online, so that he may suggest to meet up or something.)

haha,y u so cute? (obviously, rather speechless and run out of trick. May think, how come my usual trick on juvenile victim does not work?)

ask my parents
ask god (rather usual style from this girl...although I don't think she is religious)

haha!if u continuse like this,i will love u deeply (thinly veiled "I'm going to get you" so that he can keep on making suggestive remark, but using "haha" to disguised it as a joke if he fail which will obviously be the case)
=.=''''' (again her usual reply)

scare? (meaning, what does she think? Is it working?)
i think u nuts (rather lame reply from Siowgirl, was expecting some uber sarcasm...maybe she think that is too sophisticated for this shrimp brain guy)

lolz
i'm trying to tackle u,u say me nut....make me so sad,want cry already la (corny line #1: compliment her beauty/sexy, corny line#2: show you are venerable/sensitive in love life...too corny and outdated even for a dork like me...)
ok
cry for me (yeah this more like it...quasi-evil line)

my heart soft soft one,u know?easy cry (heart soft and easy cry is not so related. Me cry easily even when watching film, but have a heart of stone, or maybe stainless steel. So this is another line of that retarded to show he is 'sensitive' and he is not a playboy whatsoever. Yeah, he's an idiot)
ok
show me ur tears (another good one)

bcoz let other ppl hurt b4 (guy with a sad past, he must think this makes him look pity and will soften the girl...)
u come beside,i let u see (if the two parties is not in the same room, this must be the most idiotic message.)

Conclusion: You know those uncles in those local cheap karaoke/pub that always flirt with those middle age waitress with make up thicker than oil painting? This is what this guy will evolve to be. You may curious how I know that these uncles do, well there is one such joint at the back of my house and have witness quite a few drama whenever I pass by it.

This guy up there, if he is a player, than his victims and success case will be some teenage girl with rather low IQ and adult with low IQ that has rather low expectation, easily satisfy with cheap praise or gift or promises. Those that watch too much drama that has totally being brainwashed by it and dreamt to have such so call romantic encounter has in those drama will fall easily in this. Imagine those lala you see in the street, those physically unqualified but still wearing as little as they can and showing the poor public their spare tyre and their very bad quality skin...yeah these are the group that will fall for this trick.

So sadly, this guy think that our friend here is a or at least, think like a juvenile lala. How sad that is.

Well, it is not hard to know what kind of person he is, just read between the lines and interpret using logic and common sense. Trick is, ask yourself, why he ask such question? use such words? make such remark?

Apply it all, and you will find how retarded this guy is....lol~!

Trailer - Watchmen (2009)

Another trailer for Watchmen.

The Case of Miscommunication

So two of my friends gonna marrying each other this month end and they are going to give us invitation card for the wedding dinner.

And so the groom MSN me last Tuesday and ask if I am free on Sunday night cause he wants to pass us the invitation. Well, of course my reply will always be "Alright", "Can", "No problem" etc.

And so I waited and wondered where will the little gathering be? Our usual place? Maybe a dinner together? Or some other place that for reason unknown suddenly pop up in his mind?

And characteristically, I did not hear from him for the whole bloody week. Not even on the Sunday. Since, one of his traits is proposing a plan or gathering or activities that even he himself never meant it, and the possibility of the preparation of his wedding are so fucking consuming his time, the gathering may be called off or postpone or I may expect an last minute call.

At the end nothing. I presumption above enable me not to feel surprise, but a message on MSN with another friend revealed something much to my dismay. The friend ask "Why didn't join the mamak just now?"

Well, you know me. I'm highly flammable. And so I briefly explained that I never get any confirmation and given the groom's reputation, it is just pointless for me to proactively seek for confirmation. I am still the guess and he the host. And the second message that ticks me off his my friend said that the groom claim to have message me about it....GREAT! A brief MSN message that as if I am free Sunday night which I promptly reply asap but never get any reply or further instruction in return....WOW that is just a fucking crystal clear MESSAGE!

Of course I am pissed! I always support my friends and this wedding couple are among my dearest friend. I know the groom's character of being absent minded and never methodical in his doings but I just pissed! And those who attend never thought of calling and ask the character that always present why is he late or something. Hmm...guess the group is evolving again...

Needless to say, I made some sarcastic remark which I hope my friend sense it, and SMS to the bride explaining briefly why was I absent and thank HER for inviting me to their wedding. NO, don't imagine that I am having a row with the groom. He is my friend and I understand his character. I am just a little pissed, that's all. Especially speculating what is the odd this couple will still be joining us in our activities after they got married or after they got a child or two. This may be the very last time we go out when they are still a bachelor.

Sigh, I was once among the first to get a GF in the group, but now I am among the few still unattached and not seeing anyone. Suddenly, the loneliness crept in. No, I am not desperate for a gild, I just missed the gang as a whole. Of course the presence of a girl will be good, but looking back, I missed the good old days when we still can be considered as kid...now, only I'm the kid.